Mustard

Yellow Bird on a Branch
Are you bored in long car rides? Do you like excuses to touch people you’re normally not ‘allowed’ to touch? Does the arbitrary excite you? Are you still reading anyways?

Allow me to introduce you to: Mustard

The rules of Mustard are simple*

  1. Whenever you see a yellow car, say the word ‘mustard’ and poke someone in the car.

*While I worked at Capital One I played this with my carpool who thought is was the dumbest thing in the world until they were emotionally invested. Being the smart asses they were this simple rule was picked apart and we came up rules with advanced play.

Mustard: Advanced Play

Guiding Principle: Whenever you see a yellow car, say the word ‘mustard’ and poke someone.

Rules

What is a car?

A car is any motorized vehicle, including compacts, SUVs, trucks, semis and others.

Exceptions
The following vehicles do not count as ‘cars’ and cannot have ‘mustard’ declared on them:

  1. School Buses
  2. Construction Vehicles
  3. Motorcycles

Parked cars can have mustard called upon them. They do not need to be on the road with you for mustard to be called.

Once mustard is declared, mustard cannot be re-declared using that same car for 24 hours.

What counts as ‘yellow?’

First off, the car must be primarily yellow, meaning that 2/3rds of the car body must be painted in a qualifying yellow color. For semis, only the tractor color counts for determining the validity.

What is yellow? For most cars it should be obvious. A few less than honest players may start calling very orangish/greenish/brownish yellow cars much to the annoyance of the other players. So what is an acceptable yellow?

Using the Hue, Saturation and Luminescence scale, acceptable yellow ranges from:

  1. Hue: 50-60
  2. Saturation: 50-100
  3. Luminescence: 35-65

So if there is a dispute, take a photo of the car and use a color picker to determine who is correct.

Calling Mustard

When you call ‘mustard’ you must immediately poke another member of your cohort. Players may not ‘save up’ mustards to unleash a poking frenzy later. If you don’t poke right away (within 5 seconds) you have wasted your ‘mustard’ and lose your right to poke.

Often, two or more players will call ‘mustard’ on the same car at the same time and engage in a poke simultaneously. This is taken in good faith and both pokes are delivered and considered ‘good.’

If a player calls mustard on a non-yellow car, or on a car that has already been called, or after 5 seconds then they are to receive punishment. To discourage this behavior, one member of the group will punch the offender in their cheating face the shoulder. Like calling mustard, one only has a short window of time to administer punishment.

When you call mustard, it is considered good form to point out the car you are calling it on. This helps avoid confusion and lets players keep track of errors to administer punishments.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *